Dear New Mom

Dear New Mom,

I’m about to unleash the cliche of all cliches which you’ve heard a thousand times already, for that I’m sorry.  As a new mom, I got tired of hearing it too, I wanted to yell, “yes, I know, you’re like the thousandth person to tell me that.”  But they’re telling you this out of love and because no matter how many times you think you’ve heard it, you can never understand how terribly true it us until it’s too late.

Time is not your friend.

I know right now you may be counting the minutes until the next sleep cycle so you can shower the spit up off your body, praying for the moment your sweet, innocent, and incredibly clingy baby will let you have five seconds to pee alone, and wishing that this new little life you’ve brought into your home would just go the F to sleep already because if you don’t get at least a solid hour of sleep you may stop dead in your tracks.

But time is not your friend.

These moments that you’re anxiously waiting to pass by so you can have that mother daughter tea party under the sunshine of a beautiful spring day will pass by far quicker than you can imagine.  Those moments you’re wishing away dreaming of mother son dates where he’ll open the door for you in all his toddler might will be here and gone before you can even fathom.

I know this because I just put my four year old to sleep for the last time.  Tomorrow morning, she’ll wake up a five-year-old.  FIVE.  Like Kindergarten FIVE.  As in sleeping through the night, feeds herself, occupies herself (except for when I’m peeing- that part NEVER changes) FIVE.

And I have NO idea where the last five years have gone.  I can still remember vividly the moments of solitude I spent at the top of my (very clean) carpeted stair case five years ago tonight wondering if the precious baby girl being born the next day would be the one I got to call my daughter.  That night feels like it was just yesterday and a lifetime ago all in the same.  Tonight, I stand at the top of that same (not so clean) carpeted stair case lining it with balloons to welcome that sweet girl who IS my daughter when she wakes up tomorrow and I find myself wondering where have the last 1827 days gone.

My friend, I know being a new mom is HARD, really, really HARD (spoiler alert, it stays hard, just in different ways), but the next time someone tells you to cherish every.single.moment don’t brush it off because you’ve heard it a thousand times, listen to that person who is wiser for knowing it.  Because as hard as these first few months are with this little being who depends on you for every.single.tiny.thing time is fleeting, and relentless, and it doesn’t stop.

So, please, hold that sweet little innocent squish just a few extra moments for me, the mother who just kissed goodnight the four-year old, soon to be five-year old who has transitioned from that squishy newborn, to the tumbling toddler, to the curious preschooler, to the beautiful, sweet young lady all in what feels like a blink of an eye.

Love,

Jenn

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This entry was posted in Adoption, Baby E, Confessions, Dream Come True, God is Faithful, Happy Birthday, Parenting, Personal Reflection, Taking Care of E. Bookmark the permalink.

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